As difficult as it is to learn that your child has been bullied, it may be even tougher to discover that your child is the bully. It’s especially hard to intervene because aggressive behavior is often learned at home. And you may need to be referred for special training to help restructure family interactions. In the meantime, here are some steps you can take to deal with your child who may be a bully:

• Listen when teachers say your child is aggressive.
• Compare school reports to his or her behavior with siblings.
• Limit his or her exposure to violent media messages.
• Make it clear that it is not okay to hurt people.
• Increase your recreational time as a family.

Whether you are the parent of a victim or a bully, it’s important to realize that you are not alone and that your child probably is not psychologically disturbed. But it is important to get help early, particularly if you observe any of the following warning signs in your child:

• Has difficulty concentrating or appears listless
• Seems depressed or isn’t sleeping well
• Acts sullen, moody or withdrawn
• Doesn’t want to go to school
• No longer wants to play in the neighborhood
• Is physically abusive to siblings or pets