You’ve heard the saying: Men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. When author John Gray first introduced this idea, we learned about the differences between men  and women and how these differences can affect our relationships. Some of these same traits may also reveal a great deal about how men and women experience  depression. Since we know that men and women display their emotions differently, it’s no surprise that their symptoms of depression often vary. Let’s dig deeper:

 

• Blame – When you’re depressed, it’s tempting to hold someone accountable. Interestingly, women tend to take the blame for their own depression, while men often place the
  blame on someone else.

 

• Feelings – In our previous blog post about depression in adults and teens, we discussed how these two groups differ. In a similar fashion, women who are depressed typically experience feelings of sadness, while men often experience feelings of anger, hostility or irritability.

 

• Sleep – When women are depressed, they tend to sleep more, and they may even find it difficult to get out of bed. On the other hand, men often have trouble sleeping, and that
  can lead to over-exhaustion.

 

• Self-Medication – Regardless of gender, some people who do not seek help for depression may decide to self-medicate in unhealthy ways. Women may seek relief in food and relationships, while men gravitate toward alcohol, reckless behavior or sex.

 

• Physical Pain – Men—much more than women—may experience physical symptoms of depression, such as back pain, headaches, chest pain or digestive
  problems.

 

• Suicide – Statistically speaking, women are more likely to attempt suicide; however, men have a much higher suicide death rate. The reason? They choose more lethal
  methods, like firearms.

 

Just as the symptoms of depression vary between men and women, so do the causes.  Women may be able to link their causes to:

 

• Hormones – Biologically speaking, women are more susceptible to depression due to the natural hormonal changes they experience throughout life. From puberty to menopause, significant life changes may play a role in depression.

 

• Societal Expectations – Although depression can stem from a variety of different sources, many women cite unrealistic expectations as a cause. Society
  dictates how women should look, as well as how they should juggle their family and career. It’s no wonder they often experience feelings of inadequacy.

 

On the other hand, men may experience depression for these reasons:

 

• Stress – Society places high expectations on men as well. Our culture tells men to be problem solvers, achieve monetary success and climb the workplace ladder—all things
  that inevitably cause stress. Depression often occurs when men feel like they have failed, whether in their job, family or personal life.

 

• Change – Major life changes can be difficult. From divorce to a new baby, job loss, moving or retirement, adjustments like these make it tough for some men to adjust. This
  could lead to depression, especially in older men.

 

It’s important to remember that while both men and women suffer equally with depression, women are more likely to seek help. From an early age, boys learn to tough it out rather than
cry or show signs of weakness. As they age, they hesitate to seek help because they are embarrassed or because they believe they can overcome these challenges
on their own.

 

David Lowenstein, Ph.D. is a Psychologist and the Clinical Director of Lowenstein & Associates, Inc. in Columbus, Ohio. In addition to providing therapeutic services to individuals
and families, he offers training and consultation to numerous associations, schools and agencies around the country. Additionally, he is a frequent radio
and TV guest and a resource and contributing writer for numerous newspapers and magazines nationwide. 

Contact Dr. David Lowenstein at 691 South Fifth Street
Columbus, OH 43206 or by phone at 614.443.6155 or 614.444.0432.