January is right around the corner, and it’s known as a month when a lot of people file for divorce. They may spend the holidays reflecting on their relationship and realize it’s no longer fulfilling. When that happens, the New Year often seems like a good time to start anew.
But it doesn’t have to be that way. Many couples who are struggling to make things work may decide to give their relationship a second chance. That’s often where marriage (couples) counseling comes in. According to the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, the success rate of marriage counseling is around 70%. If your partner is willing to participate, couples counseling could be a smart choice. Here’s why.
You need a neutral third party. A counselor can listen to what both you and your spouse have to say, and then provide impartial feedback based on what they heard. Unlike talking with a family member or friend, a trained therapist is not loyal to either party, and that should lead to honest feedback.
You need to restore trust in the relationship. This is common in cases of infidelity or any situation that stems from a lack of honesty. Therapy provides a safe place to openly talk about how the trust was lost and to work on forgiveness. Your therapist can help you establish new boundaries, opening the door for healing to occur.
You’ve lost the ability to communicate effectively. You might feel like no one is listening to what you say, or that you’re constantly being misunderstood. This can be frustrating, and a therapist can help improve how you communicate with each other so that the outcomes of your disagreements are more productive.
You see everything from your own perspective. This is another common pitfall in marital couples who struggle to get along. You tend to approach everything in the relationship from your own perspective, often neglecting to consider your spouse’s point of view. A therapist can help you get past this type of miscommunication and focus on the problem at hand.
You can’t move on from certain topics. Ever feel like your arguments are on auto-pilot? The same disagreements keep occurring, but nothing ever gets resolved. It could be something small like who’s taking out the trash, but it could also be about something more significant, such as financial or parental issues. A therapist can help you address these issues and come up with a plan for resolving them.
You need to restore intimacy to your relationship. Many couples walk away from couples counseling feeling more connected with their partner. Therapy can help you tune in to each other’s physical needs and desires. Often, this occurs naturally as part of the therapy. That’s because people who feel understood experience a greater connection with each other.
If you and your significant other are experiencing any of these issues, couples counseling could be helpful. It may be just what you need to give your relationship a second chance.
Image by 👀 Mabel Amber, who will one day from Pixabay
Dr. David Lowenstein is a Columbus, Ohio-based psychologist with more than 35 years of experience. He conducts individual, family, and group therapy sessions in his German Village office and also via telehealth. Dr. Lowenstein is also available for expert forensic testimony, and for educational workshops and presentations. He is frequently called upon as an expert source for print, radio, and broadcast media. Contact Dr. Lowenstein at Lowenstein & Associates, 691 South Fifth Street, Columbus, Ohio, 43206, or call 614.443.6155 or 614.444.0432.
